Bringing Out the Creativity

My niece and I decided to work collaboratively on a couple of projects. We started out at Michael's to get some ideas and came up with headbands, duct tape, sunglasses, and gems. Along with a few items from my supply, we brought out my niece's creativity, of which she says she has none. The following is just a sampling of the wonderful creations that she made:

I think she was pleasantly surprised with how they turned out! Just wait till you see the bejeweled sunglasses!

(All of Kaitlin's creations are currently $7)

Lessons Learned from a Widow

²⁷ Pure and undefiled religion before God and the Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their trouble, and to keep oneself unspotted from the world.

James 1:27 (NKJV)

When my Pa (father) passed away 4 years ago, my Mom suddenly had numerous trials to face as a widow, some that she had to experience on her own, some that we, her kids have had to go through with her. We have learned from all of them. So today I'd like to share some of these with you so that you might be able to apply them to a widow(er) in your neighborhood, church, or family.

• Shortly after my Dad passed away, nearly everyone stopped visiting her. She was so lonely. Although it might be difficult to be around someone so sad, the visit is for the person who is lonely, not for yourself. If you don't know what to say, just stop by explaining that you are coming by just for a few minutes to see if there is anything you can do. Then leave when you have to. Those few minutes you are there will be the brightest spot in their day.

• My Mom loves little shows of thoughtfulness, because the man who did thoughtful things for her for 40+ years is not there to do them for her. Little hand-drawn cards by the kids, a flower picked from the garden, a note in the mail, or even a little gifty dropped on the doorstep, just something to let her know that someone else was thinking of her.

• Evenings and Sundays were and still are the worst days for my Mom. These were times spent with Dad. Inviting her over for dinner or letting the kids go to play at her house in the afternoon while we visited helps those difficult times pass much easier.

• Remembering special days (Dad's birthday, their anniversary, the day Dad passed away) with a phone call, a card, or a little thoughtful gift reminds Mom that she's not the only mourning the passing of a great man. He hasn't been forgotten.

• My Mom has a beautiful yard, but it's big and a lot of work. My oldest brother spends a lot of time working on the sprinklers and other yard projects that my Mom doesn't have the know-how to do. She does mow, edge, and blow her yard herself, though. (She has an independent streak). However, I'm quite sure if someone else wanted to do it for her, she would gladly relinquish the job! As my kiddos get a little older, you'd better believe they'll be out there weeding and doing yard work because a 65+ year old woman shouldn't be doing all that hard work! I guess the point of this point is that if you've got a child old enough to volunteer to do some yard work (or house work, for that matter) for a widow(er), it would probably be greatly appreciated and a great lesson for your child as well!

• My Mom has had 3 surgeries this year. Yes, three. Who helps at home when you have surgery or are sick? Your spouse, unless you don't have one. Between my brothers and I, we all try to make sure that we are there when she needs it the most, and checking in with a visit or by phone as often as we can throughout the recovery process. Perhaps you think someone who is post-op doesn't want visitors. Well, the fact of the matter is that you might be a distraction from whatever is bothering them most from the surgery. Or maybe you show up at just the right time to help find extra bandages from the cupboard. Or maybe you call just when they've realized that they could really use more Gatorade or chicken soup from the store. It's all about showing you care when they need it most.

• There have been a few issues with Mom's house that we kids don't have the expertise to handle. Amazingly, there are people who have been gracious enough to offer discounted rates on their services to her simply because she is a widow - what a blessing!

• Holidays are especially difficult. The first few Christmases my Mom had no desire to set up her decorations, inside or out. Yet we felt that it was necessary, so we went over to help set up. I think she was glad that they were up. But keep in mind, what goes up has to come down eventually. Volunteering to help with that task as well helped her get through a very difficult holiday season.

• Our family is big on camping. We were planning on going camping the summer after my Pa passed away to our favorite place: Sunset Beach. A few weeks before he passed in April (before we could get to Sunset) we had a "camping trip" in my Pa's front yard. Our camping friends and our family all came and we pulled out lawn chairs, roasted hot dogs and marshmallows over the campfire in the middle of the driveway, and sang campfire songs, all while Dad sat in his wheelchair with his oxygen tank behind him. The smiles that came from that man are what memories are made of. The next month (May) we had planned a family camping trip with all our trailers. Pa was gone. Mom had never gone camping without him. Since we have never wanted to squash her independence, my brothers have always pulled her trailer wherever she is going camping and help set up and take down. Doing this has allowed her to maintain some of her independence and her ability to do something that she truly loves and that also reminds her of wonderful times with her husband.

• One thing that I think people are afraid to do is talk about the "deceased." Fact of the matter is that those mourning want to hear about the person they love. They want to hear your memories of that person because it helps them to "not forget." For Mom, it also shows that Dad had an impact on someone else's life and that he was important enough that people want to remember him. Plus, just because he's gone, doesn't mean that everything about him has to be erased. Talking about him makes him real, not just a memory.

• Perhaps the most difficult trial has been allowing Mom to mourn in the way that works for her. She has been criticized left and right about how she shouldn't be crying anymore or that perhaps she should be trying to match herself up with a local widower. She should stop listening to the music that reminds her of Dad. She should, she should, she should... I have always scolded her for listening to the criticism. No one can walk in her shoes. No one has been married to my Dad but her. No one knows what it is like to love and be loved by my Dad. No one has lost a husband like my Dad was to my Mom. I don't think anyone should tell her how to mourn my Dad. Okay, I'll get off my soapbox now. :)

• Looks like maybe I should write a book about this! Didn't realize I had learned so much!

• My Mom is often concerned about being a burden to others. I can't get it through her head that it is a blessing to be able to take care of someone who has done so much for me. She deserves all the respect in the world! All who have walked in this world before us should be honored in this way. (Well, maybe not all, but many!)
  

• My Mom loves hugs. My Pa was one of the best huggers ever and he gave them out frequently. Now he's not here to give Mom her daily dose of hugs. My kids and I try to fill in the best we can. Any gentle little touch is a blessing: a side hug, a touch on the shoulder or back, a gigantic bear hug. All those little signs of affection show her that she is important and valuable to us.

I guess the lesson today is just to show a lonely person that they matter,
even if it is in a little way.

Come One, Come All!

SPRING FLING OPEN HOUSE

Saturday, April 30^th,

From 9-noon

Located at:

Ripon Library’s Community Room

Accessible from Main Street

Featuring:

Trading Hope Jewelry and Such

Fruitful Hands Boutique

Fountain of Youth Consignment

Homemade Baked Goods

Thirty-One

Scentsy

Silpada

Mary Kay

Recollect Photography

Pre-K Connection

For more information:

Contact Kathy at (209)-614-3746

klynncragin@yahoo.com

*Raffle to be held for gift baskets – no need to be present to win!

Just Do It! (No, Not a Nike Ad)

Just Do It: One of Many Valuable Lessons Learned from Dot

As many of you know, Dot is my Mom. She is absolutely priceless! There are so many attributes, talents, and perspectives that make up me because of my mom's life lessons. And I'm still learning from her! One of those lessons was the "Just Do It" lesson. In a nutshell: you see something that has to be done...just do it. Seems so simple, doesn't it?

But in all actuality, how often do we pass something by simply because we don't feel like doing it or we don't know exactly how to tackle it or we're too busy doing something else and it'll mess up our multi-tasking mentality? I do that all the time! Even if it is just putting away a hairclip that has been on the entryway table for a week. Or maybe the gigantic load of laundry that needs to be folded, but by now it is so wrinkled it really should be put back in the dryer for a bit to get the wrinkles out. Ever do that? I tend to get involved in my projects up to a point and then start another because I'm really excited about it, forget about the first and before you know it, I've got 10 projects that I'm in the middle of finishing!

Dot taught me this: "Well, Kathy, if you see something that needs to be done, just do it, because (and here's the mind-blowing point) then it'll be done!" You'd think that because of it's simplicity, we should all know to do that, but when I put it into practice, wow, what a difference it made. It was more of a change of attitude than anything else.

Suddenly I was grabbing six different items as I left the family room, each belonging to a different room in the house. I just dropped them off and, ta-dah: clean family room. That pile of laundry wasn't so bad when I gave myself a reward of a Hershey's Kiss when it was all done (it's the little things for me!) When I had a big to do list, I did all the quick/easy things first and my list wasn't so overwhelming with just 3 things left to do instead of the 14 I had started with! Oh, and if I had a project I really wanted to work on, I made myself do a chore I didn't want to do first so I could really enjoy what I wanted to do! Plus, a straightened up room equals a bit of sanity for me. If I can just get one of the rooms in my house in order, I feel like I can handle life again. Cleaning up the entire house is sometimes just feels impossible. But one room, I can do that! Can you see the change in attitude for me?

If you truly want to meet someone who can help put your life in a state of sanity, you really should visit the flylady. (www.flylady.net) She was introduced to me by a dear neighbor of mine a long time ago, but it's been a while since I've visited the flylady. Her page might seem full, but if you take some time to look at what she has to offer (for free) you might just discover that what seems impossible can be accomplished. Sometimes it takes baby steps to control the chaos.

Just A Stick Of Butta!

Carla's Almond Roca Recipe

Okay, so maybe it's more than just a stick of butter. The first time my dear

friend, Carla Sauer brought these goodies over as a Christmas treat, I was quite

certain that there was something very addictive in the Almond Roca. I'm

thinking it is the butter - there's two cubes, after all!

Today Jayne and I made Carla's Almond Roca.

It is so simple and SOO yummy,

you won't believe the ingredients. (I will post the full recipe at the bottom,

no need to take notes as you are reading!)

1. Cover a cookie sheet with foil and grease heavily with margarine.

2. Cover with soda crackers, laid side by side, touching.
3. Melt butter, add sugar. 4. Boil for 3 minutes.

5. Pour sugar mixture over crackers and spread.

6. Bake at 375 degrees for 5 minutes.

7. Remove from oven, sprinkle with chocolate chips.

8. Allow to melt, then spread with knife.

9. Sprinkle with nuts.

10. Let cool completely (if you can find room in the fridge!)

11. Break into pieces and ENJOY!!

Thank you, thank you, thank you, Carla, for sharing your delicious

recipe for me. You are always so generous with your delicious food,

never keeping any of the recipes secret - and I'm pretty sure I've

asked for every recipe that I have ever tasted from your house!

I hope you have the chance to make these - they will be a hit no matter

what time of year you serve them. I especially like them right out of the freezer.

More yummy goodness to come!

Kathy

Carla's Almond Roca Recipe:

1/4 cup margarine

2-3 dozen soda crackers

2 cubes of butter

1 cup of sugar

12 oz. chocolate chips

1/2 cup chopped or sliced almonds

Cover cookie sheet with foil. Grease heavily with margarine.

Cover with crackers, laid side by side touching. Melt butter, add sugar.

Boil 3 minutes. Pour over crackers.

Bake at 375 degrees for 5 minutes. Remove from oven, sprinkle with

chocolate chips. Allow to melt, then spread with knife. Sprinkle with nuts.

Let cool completely. Break into pieces. Enjoy!!

Christmas Traditions

Now that I have my website situation settled, it's time to move on to the Christmas traditions that are sneaking up on me this year. Most of them involve FOOD! This week marks the beginning of the full fledged baking season around this house. My husband will be picking up the essential ingredients tomorrow morning (because he is just the most wonderful husband ever - he does all the grocery shopping!) and the baking can commence!

This year, it will be nice to involve the kids a bit more. We mixed up some sugar cookie dough and both Jayne and Lincoln got to help. We haven't made the cookies yet, but somehow the cookie dough keeps disappearing! We end up making more dishes dirty when they help, but Jayne helps to wash them and someday maybe she'll actually get them clean.

So stay tuned this week. I will be sharing some recipes and pictures of our favorites, if only to make your mouth water... Around Thanksgiving and Christmas, there is never a shortage of fudge and it is always surrounded by various other cookies, candy, and sugar-filled treats. And this week Friday we will be carrying on the tradition of all the girls working with Grandma to create those delicious sugar cookies, cut out in all kinds of shapes and slathered with frosting and all the sprinkles the littlest girls can sneak on there!

If you are still looking for some Christmas gifts for your neices, sisters, moms, aunts, and pretty much all the women in your family, be sure to check out the boutique at its new address: http://www.fhboutique.com/. Although it is in its baby stages, you can find more pictures on our facebook fanpage as well as on flickr: www.flickr.com/photos/fruitfulhandsboutique/.

Looking forward to the food!

Kathy

Website under construction

Hi all!
Just wanted to post a correction: the website www.fruitfulhandsboutique.com is currently in the process of being bought back so it will not take you to OUR current site yet. When it does, I will let you know. For now you can find more on our flickr site as well as on our fan page on facebook.
THANKS!!
Kathy